“ALL RISE!!! Court is now in session. The honorable Bucket Hat King LJ tha Fiasco presiding. Please be seated and come to order”

Before beginning this week’s recap, I want to give a special shout out and thanks to CardNation. I have never seen such an outpouring of support in such a small amount of time, and even though it’s not for me, it feels good to know people really care and want to help.

Dave is doing great and getting his strength back. His progression in the past week is truly a blessing. If you still want to donate to Dave Scull’s GoFundMe, you can do so at the Syracuse game. If you are attending the Red Rage Tailgate, ask for Dave and let him know you want to give. You can ask for Bill or Tiffanie Jones at the Collision Course Crew’s tailgate. If you are writing a check, please make it out to K.C. Scull, Dave’s dad. Do not make it out to Dave.

South beach is great for weather, bad for Cardinal football. That’s it, that’s the rant.

I am really hoping that some time between now and 2029 a holding call is made against the Hurricane offensive line. Also, a targeting call would also be nice.

I’m bitter. Let me vent and then regret it later.

To the notes!

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  • I kept hearing Charlie Strong’s “fake juice” comment echoing in my head on Saturday. That comment always made me cringe because I don’t see how a team in a complete rebuild could be careless enough to think they can just roll the ball out and win. Few teams can do that; Louisville is not one of them. Per GG Robinson, the team had a week of great practice before heading down to Miami. Whatever happened between then and the game is unknown. Louisville had two weeks to prepare. They looked like they switched back to 2018 instead. Miami’s defense is good, but we made the offense look like the 1972 Dolphins.
  • I am trying to find a positive to take away from Saturday, and aside from the game ending, I have nothing. The running game looked good at times, and the tag team duo of Hassan Hall and Javian Hawkins ran well. Tutu had a big homecoming as well. But there was nothing outside of that to hang our hats on. The defense was embarrassed, special teams had a kick blocked and missed an extra point… the list goes on.

I saw a few people tweeting about making staff changes to the defensive side of the ball. Try not to angry tweet in the near future. I am all about venting on Twitter – that is what is was created for – but tweeting dumb sh*t will get you nothing but ridicule and screenshot for our personal enjoyment.

-Louisville has NO depth on defense thanks to the previous staff. Miami does.

-Louisville’s defensive line was, and still is, a major concern until the staff can get some bodies in here with recruiting. Help is literally on the way.

-Louisville has won five games. They are three games better than last season. Your argument about the staff is invalid.

  • This was the first time that Louisville looked unprepared and undisciplined this season. What is even more surprising is that Louisville had two weeks to prep for this. There was literally no excuse.
  • Congrats to former walk-on Dayna Kinnaird on his first career sack on Saturday. That screaming you heard was his parents celebrating.
  • You all know how superstitious and paranoid I am about Louisville athletics. I always get worried about playing games in Florida since a ton of our players are from that state. Means nothing, but I always worried about any outside distractions.
  • The Miami pass rush was relentless, and it didn’t help that Mekhi Becton went down early in the game with a leg injury. Regardless, you have to fight through adversity. Since it was senior day, Miami was extra juiced up. I am not sure Louisville wins this game even if they had depth and more weapons. Miami was in a zone, and they have been playing better the last few weeks.
  • Raise your hand if you had Ean Pfeifer scoring a TD. Put your hand down you damn liar.
  • Dez and Seth were kept in check against Miami’s defense. Both will be needed this weekend against one of the ACC’s worst pass defenses. The good thing is they have tended to bounce back for big games after losses this year (see BC, Wake, and Virginia games).
  • Micale played well despite being targeted and speared while lying on the ground. Refs basically said F it and let it go because football. Cunningham threw for 219 yards and completed 12 of 18 passes with a nasty pass rush in his face. That guy has been playing through injury all year and has not been healthy since July. He’s a warrior.
  • I hate how Louisville is always on the other end of a record setting performance. We birthed Pat White, gave AJ Dillon great footage for his draft tape next year, and made Jarren Williams look like a Heisman contender. UGH.

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The court will now be open for statements and questions. Fire away:

Danimal (@Lord_Chewie) I don’t want to dwell on a loss, can we discuss Lamar winning multiple Heismans and leading Louisville to the playoffs had we had Satterfield instead of “Dang-it-Bobby”?

We may never know how good Lamar could have been here, but we are seeing it in Baltimore. Had Lamar had a line that could protect him and block for him better we may not have lost a game with him as QB1. We will never know. Let’s not dwell on a loss or the old staff anymore. It’s depressing.

Uncle Dan (@SteelyDan88) Every single person on Twitter should review their “following” list and cut it in half. At least. My question is “ why not?”

Good question. Unfollowed.

Uncle Dan: ” Is there anything better than seeing the ‘Bama fans faces when they lose?”

Funny you ask, Dan. There actually is:

Josh Eberenz (@josheberenz) What happened? Miami caught fire at the right time? We bought into our own hype too much? Stage was too big?

Miami has not lost since their embarrassing defeat to G-Tech. Looks like Manny Diaz and crew are putting things together at the right time. Couple that with a great defense which included seniors being honored on Senior Day, and I think we were doomed from the start.

GG Robinson came out and said that Louisville may have been reading the press clippings and paying attention to the Orange Bowl hype a little too much during the bye week. There are guys on this team that are not used to winning and success, and maybe this humbling loss will refocus the team. Miami outplayed and outcoached us, plain and simple. They deserve a ton of credit.

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Person(s) or things that earned a shot of top shelf liquor this week:

  • CardNation. Thank you!
  • Dave “Biscuit” Scull. Keep fighting bro, you’re almost home.
  • Lamar Jackson cheat codes
  • Micale Cunningham
  • Dayna Kinnaird
  • Ean Pfeifer
  • Tutu’s homecoming celebration
  • South Beach in November
  • Louisville opening season wins.
  • Bama losses
  • UK football losses
  • UK football fans on the pavement
  • Tennessee football fans throwing hands

Person(s) or things that must merge on to I-65 South from 264 West during rush hour while driving in the rain with broken wipers, a donut tire, and no heat:

  • ACC Refs. Guess it will take a player dying from blunt force trauma before you guys throw a flag.
  • Miami fans calling programs “dirty.” Read that again.
  • Those individuals who told me to start Brees over Mahomes.
  • Drew Brees. Perhaps Teddy could have got the win against 1-7 ATL.
  • UK football fans thinking Lynn Bowden is Lamar. HE IS NOT.
  • The old staff. Thanks for the lack of depth guys. Really working out for us.

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And in closing:

  • Louisville remains one win away from a bowl. Luckily they have two chances to get one before heading to Lessington.
  • I am upset I will miss Senior day.
  • Syracuse game is a 4pm kickoff. Since so many of you were pissed about the die-hard conversation, here is your chance go show up in person and defend yourself.
  • Let’s hope the Cardinal party celebration comes to Raliegh, N.C. this weekend.
  • No party videos this week, but I do have this:
https://twitter.com/Ravens/status/1193853269157789696

Be cool in this hot city

Court adjourned (bangs gavel)

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LJ Nesbitt

The BHK. Writer for thecrunchzone.com , 1/2 of the TCZ Podcast. Surviving in the great city of Louisville, in the not so great state of KY. Loui$ville KY thecrunchzone.com

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