“ALL RISE!!! Court is now in session. The honorable Bucket Hat King LJ tha Fiasco presiding.
***Dude there is no one here***
Before we start, thanks for joining this Zoom call. I will be doing this each week until you guys stop coming or until a vaccine is discovered. I would like you all to know that I am not wearing pants or a shirt under this robe. I honestly forgot about the recap because I don’t have a concept of time anymore. For all I know, it’s still March 12th, and we are still waiting to tip-off against Syracuse in the ACC tournament.
You know how this goes: we are starting year five of these recaps, and honestly I am glad Cardinal football is back. I was stuck between recapping old YouTube games or my dogs bowel movements. Thank goodness football is here (for now), and we have something else to talk about other than the world we are currently living in.
At some point during Saturday’s game, I forgot we were in a pandemic, and it felt like a normal football game. Then I saw masks, heard piped-in crowd noise, and realized that we are nowhere near normalcy. Still, for those three hours on Saturday night, if felt good to watch a football game.
I dreamed of this moment when I was at this beach in Jeffersontown, KY. It was the closest I got to a shore since being in San Diego last year.
Yet, here we are.
Enough about my quarantined time. You are going through the same thing as I am, so what is the point in comparing stories on how we passed the time? Let’s get to it.
TO THE RECAP
- I was not a fan of the black-red-black combo when I first heard about it. It reminded me of Cincinnati, and then Texas Tech, but now I don’t want us to wear anything but that combo. The matte black helmets are a nice touch. Of course, anything is better than the murder bird.
- Remember the name Braden Smith. We have been hearing that name for months, and it didn’t take long for him to make a statement in the game. Four catches for 110 yards with a long of 63. Blazing speed, along with great hands. The future of the slot receiver is looking good. It’s also another weapon in the arsenal. Defensive coordinators were already trying to determine how to stop Tutu, and now this guy shows up.
- I’m really happy that we get to see Dez play another season. I still can’t bring myself to talk about how Ryan McMahon and Dwayne Sutton’s career ended here at Louisville, so I am glad the seniors for Louisville Football get to suit up one last time. I am not sure how many games we will have, but right now I am enjoying this. It also helps that Dez intercepted a would-be interception and turned it into six points.
- Logan Lupo had a forgettable debut. We are going to chalk it up to nerves and see how he does in the next few games. Not going to bash a guy making his first start in a college game. I drop things everyday, except weight. That sh*t sticks to me like two-sided tape.
- Micale Malik. Malik Micale. The guy who plays QB for us damn it!! Anyways, as long as he stays healthy I think we have a shot to have a special season. Some of his throws were ill-advised, but he looked extremely accurate for the most part. He had a career high 334 passing yards with three of those passes going for scores. I was hoping to keep the pressure on so that we can see Puma or even Evan Conley, but hey, we got football in a pandemic. I won’t complain.
- The offensive line had a slow start, but they protected Cunningham for most of the game. They only gave up one sack, which is a testament to the job Coach Ledford has done here at Louisville in just one season. Mekhi Becton was a first round pick, and Tyler Haycraft received a contract from the NY Giants. The new line that is replacing those guys struggled some but had some key stretches. I expect them to gel and get better as the season goes.
- Ean Pfeiffer is 37 years old and has a mortgage. Yet, all he does is catch touchdowns. I’m not joking, either – he has three career catches, and they all went for scores. I am well aware that he has to take a bath in Bengay and Epsom salt after each game, but I don’t see your old ass out there catching passes, so shut up.
- I miss Sean Moth already. I understand that everything has an expiration date, and change is a good thing, but after twenty years of hearing the same voice at Louisville events, it’s hard to imagine him not being up there in the booth. I am certain this is how people felt when John Tong retired. I have only known two voices, and now we have a third. I am sure it will be fine and will be an adjustment for everyone. Not sure how to feel about the “thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirddddddd down” thing, but as long as they win it could be Bobcat Goldthwait up there, and we would be happy. Enjoy your next chapter, Sean.
- Welcome back, Russ Yeast. If you remember (I’m sure you don’t), he had a major knee injury that cost him the remainder of the 2019 season. According to the staff, Yeast worked endlessly to get back on the field. It was fitting that he was able to cause, and recover, a fumble early in the game.
- Let’s be honest, WKU was gifted two scores due to special team gaffes. That being said, the defense stepped up when needed, including a big stop in the red zone late in the game. Bryan Brown’s group took a lot of heat last year, but as we see, having depth and options to rotate in and out of the game is going to be huge. In fact, Louisville was able to use 45 different players in the first half. That’s what happens when you build depth, BOB.
It was so weird not being in the stadium for the game. I have attended home games since 1999, but COVID is a selfish ________!!!
I have to consider my health, as well as my family’s. I do like that there was no line at the bathroom, and I had access to free food and liquor, but it felt like the twilight zone and was a constant reminder that we are still in a pandemic.
- I saw a few posts about the upper deck not being used. I am not going to complain because having some fans at the game is better than no fans. You have a right to have an opinion, but we could easily be the Big Ten right now and still trying to vote on if we are having a season. Enjoy it while it’s here.
- Beating WKU is oddly satisfying. It’s up there with finding some fresh bubble wrap or cleaning your ear with a Q-tip. Beating them is like dropping your crush off after a great first date and releasing the fart you have been holding in the entire time as soon as you get back to the car. I was a fan of the Hilltoppers, and then Montrezl got thrown out of a basketball game, and their Barstool account made a false claim about having more loyal fans at a neutral site. Saturday’s game was the last in the series, but I wouldn’t mind renewing it for a few more years.
- Do you think we have seen the last of the Card March? At least for a few years?
- You know what sucks? I believe this is the first year I can remember not seeing the guy holding the “D” and a small, white fence in the endzone. That guy is to Cardinal football what Sadat was to handstands at Freedom Hall. Now, all we have to look forward to is free hand sanitizer handouts and Chrissy Banta flipping tires at Ken Towery’s for sport.
- Dorian Etheridge and Monty Montgomery played like men possessed. Monty had two QB sacks, and Dorian lead the team with eight tackles. Holding WKU to 248 total yards is an accomplishment, and if you think differently, you weren’t around for the 2018 season.
- We have a ton of weapons. This team reminds me of the 2004 Cardinals with the amount of weapons we have. Javian Hawkins and Hassan Hall had some big runs, although neither cracked 100 yards. Justin Marshall made his long awaited start and hauled in a reception. Marshon Ford is still a beast when blocking and still able to find the endzone. Speed City was always a great place to live, just needed a new mayor to run things.
- Following the season-opening win, the Cards are now ranked 16th in the Coaches poll and 18th in the Associated Press poll. Yes, random UK fan reading this blog…….we are aware that only 3 of the Power 5 are currently playing.
Person(s) or things that earned a shot of top shelf liquor this week:
- University of Louisville. They had a plan and executed it. Other colleges are still trying to figure out how to get more toilet paper.
- Micale/Malik Malik/Micale…. the guy wearing #3.
- Braden Smith
- Ean Pfeifer
- Monty Montgomery
- Dorian Etheridge
- Dez 6Patrick on offense and defense
- Marshon Fuggin Ford
- Piped in crowd noise. Suck it Clemson!
- Breathable masks
- Lamar Jackson season opening wins
- Teddy starting again
- Jaire Alexander’s big day
- Eric Wood getting to work the sidelines at his alma mater.
- Curbside delivery
- Drunk Mark Richt
- The new matte helmets. Straight fiiiiire.
- Oklahoma Sooners. You know why….
Person(s) or things that have to quarantine for 14 days:
- Mike Norvell. FSU is slowly becoming Nebraska.
- COVID 19, 20, 21 and 22
- Rudy Golbert. We haven’t forgotten Rudy… we haven’t forgotten.
- Special teams. Blocked punts and fumbled snaps are not ideal.
- Lee Corso via satellite
- Dave Scull’s treatment of his dog “Honey”. She deserves better…..
And in closing
- Louisville will once again host Gameday this Saturday, but due to COVID-19, you will be watching it on TV like the rest of the country.
- Feels good to have football back in our lives. I can’t mention that enough.
- Miami is not WKU. Cards will be tested early.
- When the Cards win, they party. When they party, we ALL win.
My wings are better, my cereal is better, my bourbon is chilled, and my loud is potent.
Be cool in this hot city.
(The Zoom call has ended)