“ALL RISE!!! Court is now in session. The honorable Bucket Hat King LJ tha Fiasco presiding. Please be seated and come to order”

It was all good just a week ago.  I would give anything to only be concerned with how we would survive another week without Jaire and why Reggie is still not being used. Life was simpler when the fanbase was only worried about bouncing back after the Clemson loss.  But as we saw on Tuesday, there are much bigger issues than a football game going on at the University of Louisville.

I will say this, sometimes a dark day can bring about a huge blessing.  Without one of the worst weeks in Cardinal basketball history,  we wouldn’t have had the opportunity to introduce The Crunch Zone  (after dark) on 93.9 and ESPN 680.  Without this week, a fanbase wouldn’t unite to give one of the loudest ovations I have ever heard at PJCS for the basketball team.  I don’t have any words to sugar coat this situation, so I won’t.  Besides, who has time to be depressed when you have TBG, Biscuit, and myself dropping hot takes on late night radio and taking calls from guys drinking in their garages.  So let’s just talk some football and heal one game at a time shall we?

Any outbursts and you will be removed by the bailiff @Pat_Jaggers who is also known as “Patty Ice”.   Don’t let the red hair and clean shaven face fool you. He shotguns Red Bull just so he can be up for every moment you slept on him.  Show the man some respect.

 

  • Shoutout to Chris Person, my unconfirmed chaperone at the game on Saturday.  The BHK was asked to fill in and cover the game from the press box and being it was my first time I asked him to show me the ropes.  Otherwise I would have ended up in the scoreboard room pressing buttons and changing the game clock to 69:00.  Thanks Chris for answering all 100 of my questions and taking the fall for me when I drank all the Sierra Mist before the pregame meal.  I owe you one buddy.

 

  • Another game, another record broken.  Lamar Jackson set a new school record on his second TD pass to Dez Fitzpatrick. He set a new record for points responsible for with 542. He has accounted for 90 TD’s in his career per Kelly Dickey.  Oh yea, he is now in 2nd place on the career rushing list with 2,963 after passing Nathan Poole.  I would list the other records that Lamar set but it would take up this entire blog post.

 

  • Dez Fitzpatrick has a reputation here at Louisville. All he does is show up, suit up, catch a few touchdowns and then head back to the dorm where he dreams of doing the same thing next week.  It could be worse, he could be playing for Nebraska and rotting away in a terrible offense. Be grateful Card Fans.

 

  • I finally got the chance to see Kemari Averett up close and it was like Kevin Hart standing next to Shaq.  Holy hell that guy is gonna be a handful once he gets on the field.   If I had the choice of tackling Averett in the open field and the electric chair I would douse myself with water and tell them to crank up the voltage.

 

  • So we’re just not gonna let Van Halen on 3rd down die are we?  The crowd can’t get pumped up until they hear that piano riff playing huh?   Why don’t we up the ante and just flash Sammy Hagar on the big screen each week when we need a stop on 3rd down??  I shouldn’t care this much but I would rather hear Peter Cetera’s “Glory of Love” on 3rd down since we refuse to accept new music.

 

  • Being in the press box, you have a chance to see the who’s who of Louisville.  Saw Eric Crawford and Jeff Greer walking around.  Kenny Klein was mingling with the crowd.  Got to talk to Coach Dan McDonnell and he asked if he could wear my bucket hat with a laugh. I didn’t think it was funny so I suplexed him through a table.  I am now banned from  Jim Patterson Stadium for the foreseeable future but that is besides the point.   Folks, they serve cookies and popcorn at halftime. COOKIES AND POPCORN!!!!  As you noticed, my tweets tailed off in the second half and I don’t want to hear any complaints.  Have you tried to cover the team while you are in a diabetic coma??  Yeah, didn’t think so…

 

  • For the second straight week a true freshman was on his way to his first score and was stripped of the ball from behind.  Last week it was Josh Johnson, this week it was Corey Reed.  And ironically, both happened after a long gain.  I will chalk it up to freshman mistakes.

 

  • Unless you’re Lamar Jackson, you shouldn’t hurdle.   Here’s looking at you Malik Williams. Your hurdle in the Clemson game was awesome, but the hurdle on Saturday was awesomely bad.  I almost expected time to stand still with a record scratch and hearing your voice saying “that’s me,  I bet you’re wondering how I got in this situation”.

 

  • Colin Wilson reminds me of a bigger Brandon Radcliffe.  Runs hard and makes some good cuts.  Hated that he went down with an injury yesterday and we here at TCZ hope that it is not anything serious.  Wilson can’t catch a break.  He got sick on the field last week and now this.  Good luck going forward bro.

 

  • Hats off to the defense who got some much needed confidence the past few weeks.  Hopefully that will carry over to the NC State game and beyond.  I know it was Murray State but holding a team to 80 total yards is a huge accomplishment especially since the second and third team defense was in during the second half.  They didn’t log any sacks but they did rack up on a few tackles for loss.  Some don’t think you can gain anything from these types of games but I disagree.  Anytime you can get a redshirt or true freshman some game experience it is worth it in the long run.  Never forget, we had some second team guys in against Florida State last year.

 

  • Had a few people ask me about the attendance on Saturday.   I am not going to touch on that at all.  With the week we all had to endure, fans don’t need to read any additional criticism.   I will say , the fans that were there were loud and enjoyed the great weather.  This fanbase is resilient regardless if it’s 55,000 or 5,000.

 

  • Not every guy in a bucket hat is me.  I am the BHK, there is only one king.  I never said I didn’t have doppelgangers  rolling around on the stadium though.

 

  • Puma Pass  got his first touchdown of his Cardinal career on Saturday. It came after he fumbled his first snap which was returned for a touchdown.  That is a good omen for those who were worried that he did not throw an interception on his first pass like great QB’s before him did.   Puma finished his day with 14 completions on 19 passes for 115 yards and one touchdown. He also scored his second TD late in the 4th quarter when he plunged into the endzone from two yards out.  I didn’t like that he was sacked a few times but for the most part he played great. I hope we get to see him in other games down the road.

 

  • Holy Lord Voldemort…..did we get treated to a Harry Trotter sighting?? Why yes, yes we did .  Harry Trotter carried twice for 11 yards and then he cast a spell on the visiting team’s locker room  (**Disclaimer** I hate that I had to use Harry Potter puns in this post.  My followers don’t deserve that so I hope they can understand. I am just glad Harry Trotter is a part of the team and not  trying to defend the Ministry of Magic………….damn it.)

 

  • Whenever I am having a bad day, I will always go back to this picture:

Q looks like he just won big at the blackjack table.

 

  • I spotted Mekhi Becton’s dad outside of the stadium before the game.  He literally looks like he just finished playing pro ball a year or so ago.  I don’t want to expand any further on that for fear he will recognize me at a game and confront me.   I have not soiled myself in public since I was like 3 and I am in no rush to do it again as a grown man.

 

  • Cookies and popcorn in the press box…..still can’t believe I got to watch football and was treated like a middle schooler on movie day.

 

  • Seeing Jaire, Jaylen Smith, and Drew Bailey in street clothes before the game is a reminder that this team is still getting healthy.  It also lets me know that once they are at full strength, especially on defense, the Cardinals will still be a force to be reckoned with.

 

  • Can we talk about gratitude for a moment?  This is for you Rally Squirrel.  All week long you have been reading your press clippings and seeing face plastered all over the national news. You could’t make one more appearance?  You couldn’t issue one thank you?  You act like you’re the Albino Squirrel or something and you sir are not.  Pride comes before a fall bro….

 

And in closing I just want to say thanks to all of the Cardinal fans that supported myself, Joe Kelly, and David Scull this week while we provided late night coverage on the radio. Thanks to Drew Deener, Jason Anderson and Nate Huber for the opportunity.  Thanks to Moose and Patty Ice for staying up all night with us to make sure the show was produced.  Thanks to Mark Blankenbaker for setting me up with this chance to further my experience as a blogger and giving me a chance to cover the game from the press box (cookies and popcorn). I am sure I am forgetting someone so apologies to anyone that was left off.

The BHK is humbled by all of this and I just want to thank CardNation for tuning into the show(s) and showing us love.  Thanks to Inmate 97J-539 for risking his rec room time and calling us from his cell using a burner phone.  Thanks to the guy who was having marital problems for calling us to vent about life.   TCZ after dark is for the people

I can’t promise the next few years will be easy,  in fact they may be some of the darkest years that any of us will ever see. But I can promise that through it all CardNation will still be standing once the smoke clears.  And this is why Birdgang is the only gang I am proud to be a part of.

 

Be cool in this hot city….

 

Court adjourned (bangs gavel)

 

 

 

 

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LJ Nesbitt

The BHK. Writer for thecrunchzone.com , 1/2 of the TCZ Podcast. Surviving in the great city of Louisville, in the not so great state of KY. Loui$ville KY thecrunchzone.com

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